Posted in Inspiration, self reflection, Transparency

Been Down, But Not Out

Expressed by: Cassandra Dennis

WOW!! Okay, where do I start? Well, I’ll begin with the rudder, the catalyst, the straw on the camels back that began to stir and steer me in a new direction in my life.

I attended an “Own Your Shit” workshop a week ago. The intention of my attendance was to support the Facilitator, @MariannaSousa. I ended up in a safe environment that began the path of healing me of events from my past. Although the events occurred in the past I now understand the reason for my alter persona, Miss Nice Nasty. I separated myself from this persona a few years ago, but she still lives within me causing an internal conflict between who I truly desire to be and who I and others want me to be for the sake of my ego and their entertainment. In this workshop @MariannaSousa led me through the connections between that little girl, who experienced trauma in her life to my current mindset and actions. You know I hear healing direction such as this and say, “I know this” or “that has no bearings on who I am now.” Bullshit!! Unless I have truly healed from those events, not swept them under the dirty, shag carpet or buried it in the deep dark corners of my mind, but truly healed from events of my life they are playing an active part in my current mindset and actions.

The key is not to dwell there or to continue to carry the burden of someone else’s words or actions, it is to OWN my healing from those events by following that sometimes invisible thread from then to now and understanding why I am making the decision not to wear my “Big Girl Panties” and choosing to live out the actions of that hurt and misunderstood little girl. In this workshop I wrote out two questions and one exclamation to ask myself and others before automatically defaulting to Miss Nice Nasty.

  1. Is it true? Is the information being presented true, not my and any one else’s opinion, but is it factual? Then decide if I even what to act upon that fact.
  2. Does it align with my goals or passion? If I don’t set my own standards and goals, someone else will and I will live my life for others and not for God and me.
  3. I am worthy of more! Stop settling for less because I am growing weary in my pursuit of my goals and passion. Strengthen my endurance level physically and emotionally and cease the “I quit” mentality.

All of this seems simple and it can be if I had not decided to live a compromised life. It is the rudders (the small things) of life that can steer you to triumph or destruction. I realized as I grew older and my children no longer needed me, I began to exist (living out who others want me to be) instead of reaching back and updated past goals and renewing my passion. To be honest, I still don’t know what my passion is, but I do know I enjoy sharing my life experiences with others. Which leads me to why I am sharing this with you. I want you to know, no matter the stage of our life we can always hit the RESET button and renew, refocus and heal; that power is always within us and is completely up to us. After all my life is my own, there is no one else on this earth that can live out the true, transparent, AUTHENTIC me.

Therefore, I encourage you to be empowered, be authentic and be TRIUMPHANTLY you.

Posted in Evaluate, Goals, Inspiration, self reflection, Transparency

So Tell Me My Sister

Author:  Cassandra Dennis

So tell me my Sister, what are your dreams, your fantasies, your goals to achieve?  Your purpose, your mission, your plan to weave?

What are your core values?  You know what I mean.

What defines your character, your worth?  You know those values that consistently redeem your moral compass, that under-girds your passion, that inspire and empower you to dream ABOVE average, to think ABOVE average and to live ABOVE average.

Crickets…. I can’t hear you my Sister.  Come out of the well of your mind, return to the light, follow my voice, explore, evaluate and retrieve your life.

Tell me, tell me, tell me my Sister, what happened in your life that depleted you, defeated you and embittered your mind to all mankind?

It is not my fault, I’m only extending a hand, but I will ask for forgiveness as I stand in the place of the One’s who hurt you.

My Sister STOP!

Don’t focus on the darkness.  Inside the bowels of your mind can be a slippery slope, which has the ability to envelope you into an abyss of no return.  Hear my voice, seek the footprints on the path that has already been laid out for your journey.  Focus on the intermittent lights that represent multiple hands of opportunity to redeem, renew and restore you.  Don’t pass that up for the land of self pity, for what has that land done for you lately?

I’m here my Sister.

Your life is YOURS to explore, YOURS to evaluate, YOURS to retrieve and YOURS to LIVE; but the choice to act is YOURS.

So Tell Me My Sister, what do you choose?

Posted in Goals, Inspiration, renew, self reflection

What’s Your Mantra?

Expressed by: Cassandra Dennis

What’s your mantra: your hymn, your incantation, your psalm, your SHOUT? You know the repetitive chant or poem or quote or song  or combination of them all, that keeps you inspired, motivated and keeps you in forward motion on your journey? For NIKE it’s #justdoit, they also promote Kevin Durant’s #risegrindshineagain.

Come on you have one, SHOUT IT OUT, except if you are in the library or church, then just whisper it.  You know the mantra that keeps you focused, that reminds you that strategic action is required to accomplish your goals and to move from one stage and level of life to the next.

I have several depending on what I need to persevere that day, but my main mantra is, “Life:Own it Don’t Blame it.”  See my life is my own.  No matter what decisions I make, good or bad; no matter what has been done to me or what I allowed or what I have done to others, my life is mine and only I can shape it to truly be what I want it to be.  At the end of the day no matter what I portray on social media, does my life truly represent the words I speak?  For me, yes and no, because I’m consistently striving to be the best me.  Although, I live a life of transparency, there are some aspects of my life, where I am faking it until I make it.  Yep, I wear a mask sometimes, not to hide my weaknesses but to hide the ugliness of an intimate part of my journey.  It is during this time that I may be purging and layers of the old me are being peeled away so that the revived, creative, reborn me can press in on the path I am traveling.  It is definitely during these times that I rely on my mantra or a song or my favorite poem to empower me through the challenge, strengthen my resolve, and learn my lesson(s) for the next level of my life.   After all in the words of Oscar Wilde, “I must be myself, everyone else is already taken.”

If you don’t have a mantra, what are you using to empower yourself on those days where you want to give up?  What or Who reminds you not to be easily distracted or encourages you to stare fear in the face and steam-roll that devil.

If you are at a point in your life where you are spinning your wheels, revamp your plan, set a path and commit to it; no matter the costs or sacrifices.  If it’s what you truly desire then the costs and sacrifices will be worth it; and the experiences along the way will be priceless.  Sooooooo, what’s your mantra?  Share it in the comments below.  You never know; your transparency may help someone else.

The song that’s pumping me up for what I need to accomplish today is, “We Livin”, by Tina Campbell.   I’M PUMPED!!! WHAT ABOUT YOU?

Posted in Goals, Inspiration

Hold Your Head Up…

Expressed by:  Cassandra Dennis

Hold your head up, know your worth, pursue your dreams.

Hold your head up, know your worth, pursue your dreams, in spite of fear.

Hold your head up, know your worth, pursue your dreams, without the support of others.

Hold your head up, know your worth, pursue your dreams, regardless of resources.

Hold your head up, know your worth, pursue your dreams, there is never a perfect time.

Hold your head up, know your worth, pursue your dreams because…

  • as you walk out your dream you will steam roll fear;
  • as you gain and apply knowledge, the naysayers will become your followers or your clients;
  • as you formulate, negotiate and barter to manifest your dream it strengthens & reveals the resources already available within you;
  • as your dream manifests you realize the missteps were not lessons in perfect timing, but in learning that opportunities avail at the point of preparation.

For these reasons, don’t allow your current circumstance distract you from the bigger picture.  After all it is temporary, that is if you decide to make it temporary.

So Hold your head up > Establish your worth > pursue, accomplish, manifest your dreams.

You got this.  Life: Own it, Don’t Blame it.